This story is published at Women on Web.

I had an 2 abortions. My feelings were comfortable, peaceful, resolved, relieved, confident, sure, guilty and sad.

I was not blaming myself because I took a decision by myself. No one forced me to that.

My abortions were with medicines, by myself. It was quiet, the same with my periods, but it was paining because I knew I was aborting.

My situation at the time was complicated by financial issues, getting my education, my age, problems with my relationship. Also, I have one son already so I can’t have another baby.

With my first abortion, people were supportive, and the second one was my secret.

~ Ayabonga Mzondi