"I have no desire to have children until I am spiritually, financially, and mentally ready for them."

This story was published at Project Voice, which is no longer accessible on-line.

While stationed overseas, I did have an abortion. I was in a country where I did not speak the language at all. I was devastated and upset about the situation that led to my decision.

My decision was not an easy one. It happened over a three day period. The person I was involved with taught me a lesson that one should never rush into a relationship and read into the lies.

This person who I was involved with wanted me to have the baby. I couldn't due to the fact that he lied about being divorced, when indeed he was still married. This person was full of lies and deceit that I do not regret my decision.

Another thing that led to my decision was the fact that I was still unemployed when I got back to the states. I was still wondering where my next paycheck would come from when I returned.

I could not believe that this person chose to sleep with me even though he was married. When I told the person who I was pregnant by that I was pregnant, he tried to control me and keep me away from my friends. I had to be in his room at all times.

I continued to refuse to abide by him. I was fed up with the lies and deceit.

I had scheduled an appointment with a counselor after I found out that I was pregnant. I was not sure of what my options were due to the fact that I did not speak the language.

The first counseling appointment I missed because the father, who wanted me to keep the child despite the drama, was late getting me there. I got lost in town there, I found the place and was late for my appointment. I had to reschedule. I spoke with another counselor who was supportive after I explained to her what I was going through, she understood and gave me my form to have an abortion.

I could not believe I had to wait three days after receiving my form to have the procedure. I couldn't wait to get this over with. Don't get me wrong-- I want children by a man who is not a liar and has the same views that I do about life. I have no immediate desire to have children until I am spiritually, financially, and mentally ready for them. I want a husband who cares for similar things that I do.

I had a friend who took me to the clinic. She was the only one who I told my story to and no one else. After arriving to have my procedure done, I filled out paperwork and placed into a waiting room where there were women of different races and from different countries.

I was shocked at how full the waiting room was. After waiting for over an hour, I was taken to another room and told that I had to take my clothes off and place them into a locker. I then walked to another room where I had to lay down on a table and had an IV into my arm.

An ultrasound was taken where they found out that I was six weeks pregnant. I understood that, as I was pregnant with twins. My stomach was so big for being six weeks along.

I did not have morning sickness, only nauseous when around foods. I could not drink coffee because it made me sick even more. I could not concentrate at work with all the things on my mind.

I am now somewhere where I found peace.

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I spoke to the nurse who translated for me. She was understanding. I could afford to pay for the procedure, and as for the deadbeat father who said he would pay, he did not and didn't take me to the clinic either. I no longer cared, as I had nothing else to do with him. I was done for good.

After going through my thoughts waiting with an IV in my arm, the doctor came in and gave me a sedative. I did not want to be awake at all during the procedure. I wanted complete sedation.

I went to sleep, then I woke up feeling fine one minute and then the pain started. I was in so much pain. I asked the doctor if I could have something to stop it. She told me I had to wait until rest of my IV was done.

The pain was similar to my worst menstrual cramps. I was irritable to the point where I received some green tea and pain medication. Along with the pain medicine, I received some chocolate covered Belgian waffles. They were great and addictive. I ate those and took a cab back to my room where I recovered.

I did not want to talk about it for a few days. After, my friend brought me some fast food and asked if I needed anything else. I was OK, I just wanted to be alone.

Then randomly, I began to cry. I did not understand why, as I did not regret my decision. I cried for a few minutes, and I read the bible. I know that I am forgiven by God's grace. I know that he sacrificed his only son for all of mankind that have sinned.

I said if I had it to do over again, I would have not had sex at all with this person. I was angry over the situation that led to my pregnancy, for I used protection and yet it failed me. I found peace with myself that night.


"We really only wanted one more and just couldn’t handle two more."

"We could not have kept them anyway, we are struggling to stay afloat with my two kids as it is."