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I had 2 abortions and now scheduled for my 3rd. Both the first 2 abortions were with reason, and this is with reason, although thinking about it makes me feel like I'm a horrible person, that I should have known better.
My 1st abortion was scary, easy but scary. I had a 1-year-old son and was still in university. I couldn't have possibly been able to afford two kids and myself and I had dreams I needed to achieve.
Four months down the line I was pregnant again, same boyfriend. Just like the second pregnancy (he is the father of my son) he accused me of cheating, claiming it was not his child.
Funny, he even took me to the clinic in discrete so our parents wouldn't find out because at the time I was visiting at his house.
But the clinic did not offer abortion services, so I opted on getting the pills and doing it at his house. His mom was on nightshift, so after she left for work I had enough time from 6pm to 6am, so I took the pill.
While in pain and bleeding out and at the same time caring for a 1 year old, this guy decided he will go out for the night with his friend and from then I called it quits with him.
Currently, I'm graduating in a month after 6 years of my studies and I have been doing my internship for 2 of these 6 years, 17 hours away from home.
I have been staying celibate since my former boyfriend until I met a sweetheart,of a man —at least I thought he was. But he lied to me. He told me he was infertile, and so here I am with another pregnancy.
I'm on the brink of a promotion and a child at this point would mean to give up everything.
I still have a now 4-year-old child back home and I'm currently still earning a student stipend. It will only bring pain and suffering to this poor child if I give birth to it, the father having lied to me about infertility.
I'm not risking believing he will be around when the baby comes. He says he is sorry but the damage is done.
I have thoughts of keeping the baby sometimes but honestly I will not be able to afford it and my mother will be dearly disappointed in me after how much she has invested in me.