All tagged Childfree

"I spent my childhood looking after my younger siblings and saw my mom struggle as a single parent on a low income my whole life. I vowed to never be like that."

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Two Abortions, Multiple Abortions, Locations not given

“I accidentally got pregnant and had an abortion during the pandemic. It was pretty traumatic but I was instantly relieved. Since then I’ve gone on to get my bachelors and masters degree. When I think of my future, I envision freedom, adventure and peace of mind. Two years later, here I am again with another unwanted pregnancy.” This story includes supportive comments from others who’ve had more than one abortion. Read more.

"He was an alcoholic. I didn’t want to be a mother under these circumstances."

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Two Abortions, Location Not Given

“The abortion at 39 was harder. I felt I “knew” most women my age would be thrilled to be pregnant. I felt it would be my last chance to be pregnant. I was with an economically unstable man. We had just moved in together. He said he was recovered but didn’t go to AA or anything. I was already depressed and feared postpartum depression. I did not want the baby.” Read more.

"I had a bad childhood and have no family, and I don’t want to continue my genetics on to another person."

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Two Abortions, Canada

“I am 24 and with a different long term partner. When I found out, I was upset, but immediately knew I needed to terminate. I’m living in a basement, I’m poor and can barely take care of myself. I found I grew some attachment for a brief couple of days, but ultimately, this procedure was much easier emotionally. I don’t regret it or feel like I made a mistake.” Read more.

"I am interested in hearing from women in their 40s without children who've had abortions and might be worried that because of their age this might be ‘the last shot'. "

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Two Abortions, Multiple Abortions, Locations not given

“I had my second abortion at age 42 and did have a moment of pause about it being likely my last chance to have a child. When I considered what I wanted my life to look like, and what I would want a child’s life to look like, they simply didn’t match up. I wasn’t in a place where I was willing to make the life changes needed to raise a child. I think every child born should be an intentional choice. People should be REALLY sure they want to give all that it takes to raise and support a thoughtful, kind human before having a baby.” Read more.

"Due to my troublesome childhood I had decided years ago that I would never want to be a mother."

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Two Abortions, U.S.

“Lucky for me, the procedure worked, even though I was so early in my pregnancy. I was relieved and thankful that I had the privilege of having the option to terminate. Fast forward to now. I haven’t been nauseous but my breasts have been extremely tender. I woke up this morning, 1 day before my expected period, knowing I needed to take a test. Sure enough, pregnant again. The appointment has been made, I will be terminating this pregnancy as well.” Read more.

"I think of the damage those children might have experienced with me as their mother."

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Three Abortions, Georgia, U.S.

“I know being wanted isn’t a guarantee of a child’s happiness or success, but after I got sober at 25, I went back to school and got a degree in social work. I worked in child abuse investigations for 20 years, and I can’t count the number of children I saw who had been targeted, scapegoated, tortured, and vilified because they were unwanted. The most basic gift we can give children is to be wanted and loved. Every child should have that starting out.” Read more.

"Growing up in a house with a large dysfunctional family made me realize I didn’t want to pass on my trauma."

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Multiple Abortions, Oregon

“My girlfriend got pregnant in her early 20s and I took her to planned parenthood in Portland in the early morning hours for an abortion. This was in the late 1970s. It was dark outside and there was already a group of men harassing us. It stuck out to me that these men had no right to shame us or talk about our choices on any level and I fought back. It felt good then and it still does.” Read more.

"I have a good job, a stable life, a beautiful dog, and I don’t want children ever."

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Seven Abortions, U.K.

“I’ve been refused contraception from my GP due to underlying health issues, and refused sterilisation because I’m too young and apparently “will change my mind on not wanting children”. That’s a whole separate issue. I see abortion as a perfectly legitimate medical procedure to remove a tiny cluster of cells from your body, similar to getting your appendix out, or a cyst removed.” Read more.

"I thought I would end up being one more mother pretending to be happy." ~ "Pensé que terminaría siendo una madre más fingiendo ser feliz".

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Two Abortions, Mexico, In Spanish & English, Later Abortions

“I tried to get used to the idea of having it, and in a moment of madness I told everyone. I called it good news. That same night I regretted saying it because I really didn't want it and neither did their support make me change my mind.” Read more.

“Traté de acostumbrarme a la idea de tenerlo, y en un momento de locura se lo conté a todos. Lo llamé buenas noticias. Esa misma noche lamenté haberlo dicho porque realmente no lo quería y tampoco su apoyo me hizo cambiar de opinión ”. Lee mas.

"I have never written about my abortions before." ~ Journalist Mona Eltahawy

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Two Abortions, Egypt, U.S.

“Why couldn’t I, Mona Eltahawy, a woman born in Egypt to a Muslim family, write an essay under my own name, in which I say openly and without shame that I have had two abortions, that I am glad I had those two abortions and that had I become pregnant again I would have had another abortion because I did not want to have children? Why have I been able to risk my safety and my life by writing articles about a military-backed regime but I could not write about my abortions?” Read more.

"I’m trying to let go of a bit of the guilt I feel from this being my second procedure."

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Two Abortions, U.S.

“I found out I was pregnant about 2.5 weeks ago. I had a complete meltdown and was conflicted on what I wanted to do. For a while I was 50/50 — primarily because I felt guilt because if I decided to terminate this would be my second termination, and I felt so much guilt/shame over that. My last termination was a very long time ago, 10 years or so and I was super young and didn’t think twice about terminating.” Read more.

"I was seriously depressed realizing that this man wasn’t into actually committing to me or having a family."

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Three Abortions, Location Not Given

“I left that person because he’d lied to me and didn’t want what I wanted in life. I’ve never regretted my decision as I was a hurt, lost person at that point in my life. And I watched my sister, who was a teen parent, struggle and fail. I never wanted that hard a life, especially for any child of mine.” Read more.

"Unfortunately we are stuck with this system that forbids us to own our own bodies." ~~ "Infelizmente, estamos presos a esse sistema que nos proíbe de possuir nossos próprios corpos."

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Two Abortions, Brazil, Illegal, Portuguese/English

“I slept peacefully all night after the abortion happened. The next day a friend came to my house and we went for a walk and distracted ourselves and I didn't feel any pain! Super quiet and fast. The trauma is not the procedure, it is the stress of the moment you discover the pregnancy and when starting the abortion. Then, I found out that I am pregnant again. 3 years later.” Read more.

"Pude seguir un plan de vida que probablemente, no es el que los demás esperan de mí." ~ "I was able to follow a life plan that is probably not what others expect of me."

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Two Abortions, Mexico, Spanish/English

“Mi conclusión fue que probablemente jamás querría ser mamá, me preocupó el hecho de que esto decepcione a mi familia (todos mis hermanos y hermanas ya tienen hijos), pero la verdad es que yo no quiero.” Lee mas.

“My conclusion was that I would probably never want to be a mom, I was concerned about the fact that this disappoints my family (all my brothers and sisters already have children), but the truth is that I do not want to.” Read more.

"I hate the feeling of my body being out of my control or taken over by something I don't want."

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Four Abortions, Australia

“I never want children. I want to get my tubes tied but doctors refuse to do this because they believe I will change my mind when I am older. The first time doctors treated me like I didn't have the ability to make a decision for myself. When I told the second doctor that I didn't feel capable of being a parent she offered me counseling and support services, like I might change my mind. The third doctor made me feel like I needed to justify why I wanted it done. The fourth made me feel bad about myself and like I was a horrible person.” Read more.

"I just want to be able to have someone take me seriously when I say I don’t want to be a mother."

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Four Abortions, U.S.

“After my first abortion I saw several doctors to talk about my options. I had been on the depo shot, but I had adverse effects and had to stop getting it. I wanted to talk about sterilization, of course I was ignored. I was made to believe I just wasn’t old enough to know, that I would change my mind, and 7 years, and 3 abortions later my mind has never wavered.” Read more.

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